Thursday, July 20, 2017

Perspective Taking & 'State Vs. Calibration' For Attracting Women

There is this huge misunderstanding among men who study attraction techniques or "PUA" tactics for attracting women, and it boils down to this question:

"What's more important for attracting women-being in the right STATE OF MIND, or being able to CALIBRATE properly?"

State of mind refers to being in that state where you are confident, optimistic, sexual, dominant, flirty, playful, relaxed-all that good stuff!

Calibration refers to being able to use all the various techniques of attraction and connection properly-in the right amounts, at the right time.  So for example, calibration would include playfully teasing a woman when you first approach her, but not right in middle of you and her making love!

I give this obvious example to make my point clear, however calibration refers to far more nuanced and subtle things as well. It means knowing when a woman is actually testing you, and when she is just truly being playful and funny.  It means knowing exactly when to stop playfully teasing and progress the interaction forward. It means knowing when you've screwed up and apologizing. It means knowing when to kiss, and when to pull back to create more sexual tension. It means all this and so much, much, MUCH more.

But the answer to what is more important all depends on the INDIVIDUAL.



Some men are NATURALLY great at calibrating; they have amazing social skills with ALL human beings, but when it comes to approaching women out of the blue, or even women in general who they want to attract, there is fear, anxiety, insecurity that FREEZES them up.

And because of THAT, they can't access their mental processors for CALIBRATING.  Their brains are too busy being FROZEN because they have gone into FIGHT/FLIGHT/FREEZE as a result of the AMYGDALA in the brain being triggered by stress.  The amygdala SHUTS down all the thinking and turns on the biology to prepare you for DANGER.  As if a tiger is about to jump at you.  And your brain doesn't think then-it just causes your body to react physically and your mind emotionally-and not in a productive way.

So for a guy like that, it's ALL about STATE OF MIND.  If he can get into the right state of mind again, then he can naturally access his CALIBRATION SKILLS if he already has them.

For HIM, it is also true that calibration skills are SUPER IMPORTANT, but since he already has them, he doesn't have to worry-HE has to work on his STATE OF MIND.

But for other men, they may be totally OBLIVIOUS to fear or anxiety or giving a damn about what anyone thinks at all, to a point that this is actually a FAULT. They may be in a GREAT state of mind, but they lack the ability to truly engage in maximum PERSPECTIVE TAKING, and CALIBRATION requires MASTERING the skill of PERSPECTIVE TAKING!

Perspective taking means you can truly feel and sense what it is like to be ANOTHER person. So if you want to calibrate properly, you must be able to SENSE what it feels like for HER to be on the RECEIVING end of whatever you are saying and doing with her. This is a SKILL.

In fact, calibration is IMPOSSIBLE without highly developed PERSPECTIVE TAKING skills.

And what is so funny is that 99% of the guys who talk about being ALPHA completely UNDERESTIMATE the absolutely MASSIVE ROLE of perspective taking.

They think that being ALPHA means NOT caring what SHE is thinking and feeling, when in reality this stuff is EVERYTHING! They mistake the idea of "not seeking approval" with truly not CARING or FEELING what she is feeling or thinking. 

How can you know if you are teasing too much and it's time to go into deeper rapport, if you can't actually FEEL and UNDERSTAND the interaction from HER perspective? After all, you aren't calibrating for yourself, you are calibrating to get HER!

It's also ironic how this stuff is SO important, and yet you can see how LITTLE most of the so called "experts" really know about perspective taking, and even worse, how little they actually INTUITIVELY AND EMOTIONALLY feel perspective taking, because they FILM WOMEN WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION and put them up on the internet!!!!  Even the greatest ignoramus in the world could see that this is something that women would feel BAD about, but there is so horrifyingly LITTLE perspective taking ability or feeling in these guys that they go right ahead and do it anyway.

There is so much out there about being ALPHA that actually is NOT true. The TRUE alpha GETS the woman, and since perspective taking and the ability to truly FEEL what she is feeling, and the ability to feel and understand her perspective is INTEGRAL to your success in getting the woman, PERSPECTIVE TAKING is therefore an absolutely FUNDAMENTAL part of being a successful ALPHA-MALE.

And it's also important to understand how perspective taking and calibration go hand-in-hand. For example, if you are in a CONFIDENT state of mind, then you will not negatively DISTORT the things a woman says and does. This means you will be better at perspective taking accurately, and allow you to CALIBRATE your response perfectly. 

In my video, I give the example of a mind-blowing woman who was at my place, and she mentioned how my TV is from the 1960s. If I was in a bad state of mind, a weak state of mind, an insecure state of mind, I would have felt threatened, insulted, or challenged, and I would have thought I had to "strike back" to get her down to size and off her pedestal. That would have RUINED the entire vibe and DESTROYED the attraction.

But the fact is, being in a great state of mind helped me understand she was being PLAYFUL. Not only could I tell from her tonality, but also because she HERSELF was calibrating her humor very INTELLIGENTLY.

The reason I say this is because one of the great ways to CALIBRATE a playful tease is to make sure that the thing you are saying cannot be interpreted seriously by anyone with common sense. So the fact is, there is NO REALISTIC WAY that she ACTUALLY thought the TV was from the 60s and that it was 57 years old! 

That is PROOF she didn't REALLY mean it.  (Notice that SHE was calibrating properly.)

And of course, even if she did mean it, it really doesn't matter much one way or another, as far as what the INTELLIGENT response should be, right?

So I did what I FELT like doing, based on my state of mind AND my understanding of the situation-I thought it was FUNNY, so I LAUGHED.  It was the perfect response, and it allowed us both to laugh and move AHEAD, as neither one of us had TV in mind.

And we never ended up watching TV that night ;)

As you can see, I know what I'm talking about, and it's also why I love CUSTOMIZING my training for each man, because each man is DIFFERENT. I can tell exactly what YOU need, which is different from what the NEXT guy needs. Whether it is SKYROCKETING your state of mind with women, or whether it is perfecting your CALIBRATION SKILLS with women, or whether it is any of DOZENS of other skills, such as creating spontaneous humor, or whether it is a combination of these things, I will get you the success you want with women by CUSTOMIZING your training so that it's perfect for YOU. 

I will assess your strengths and weakness and then create the PLAN for you, and then CARRY OUT THAT PLAN WITH YOU so that you QUICKLY see the success you want with women right before your eyes. My live coaching, including my bootcamps, are EXCLUSIVE. That means you get 100% of my time during bootcamp. The attention is not split between you and other students.  This allows you to get the skills you need to attract women FASTER than anything else on EARTH.

I seriously suggest you sign up for my bootcamp NOW at:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/bootcamp.html

And I also seriously suggest you download ALL my digital programs for skyrocketing your success with women. Each and every single one of these programs will BLOW YOUR MIND with VITAL strategies and knowledge for success with women that you won't find anywhere else.

These programs give you the KNOWLEDGE I have gained over 15 YEARS in the field of helping men attract amazing women, and these programs also allow you to make MORE out of your live coaching with me because you are not coming in to my live coaching then as a total beginner.     

Download these programs at:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/catalog.html

For a SKYPE or phone consultation with me, go here:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/consultations.html

I will ensure you DO attract the women you want, and if you are in a relationship, I can also help you solve any RELATIONSHIP issue you want FIXED.

Till next time,

Michael Marks

Monday, July 17, 2017

Why Women Need Masculine Men

MASCULINITY, when COMBINED
with the skills to create a DEEP LEVEL
CONNECTION, is what attracts a woman
and turns her into a fantastic girlfriend who
will be loyal to you to the ultimate level.

Since 2003, I have been focused on
helping men RECLAIM the power
of being a MAN.

In fact, in my first book, "The Dating Wizard:
Secrets to Success With Women", the term
"THE MAN" appears tons of times. 

It's the ESSENCE, if you will, of the book. 

What do I mean by “THE MAN”?

I mean being everything that a man is
NATURALLY, before he got brainwashed
by too much modern culture over the past
several decades.

Before then, man's natural sense of masculinity
was pretty much the same since the BEGINNING
of TIME.

Yes, it's nice we have become more
civilized and moved out of the caves,
but that doesn't mean that there aren't
certain PRIMAL elements of masculinity
that we SHOULD NOT REPRESS.

Pretending that we aren't men only serves
to WEAKEN a woman's attraction to us.

In order for a woman to feel FEMININE and to
feel attracted, then on the deepest, most primal level
she must sense that you are "the yin" to her "yang",
the MASCULINE to her FEMININE.

This is polarity working in your favor.
The more masculine you are, the more feminine she feels.

She must sense MASCULINITY in you in a RAW
visceral sense.

This is why it’s so important in our MODERN
culture to NOT be swayed by media or images
or politically correct mentalities that tell men
that men and women are THE SAME.

Women are INDEED worth EVERY BIT
AS MUCH AS MEN, I SWEAR to that.

And they deserve every last iota of respect
that any man does.

But men and women are not “IDENTICAL” IN THE SENSE
OF BEING THE SAME DNA.

In fact, a society that does not SEPARATE
the concepts of MASCULINITY AND
FEMININITY actually ROBS both men
AND women of the joy of sexuality.

Now, it's hard to argue with the entire
HUMAN HISTORY backing up these
facts.

Everything has changed in the past few
decades. Before that, however, and in
fact since the beginning of RECORDED
HUMAN HISTORY, the concepts of
masculinity and femininity were clearly
defined in every culture.

It's ALWAYS been important to separate
and define the MASCULINE vs. the FEMININE.

In the past, this was always clear.

Today, IT'S POLITICALLY INCORRECT
to preach masculinity.  Instead you must be
one of the few men who know the SECRET
of how important it is to actually BE masculine
even though we keep being told as men to
REPRESS our masculinity.

You must KNOW it and PRACTICE it, even
in the face of politically correct hogwash that
says men and women should act exactly the
same.

Women expect a man to know that modern
politically correct talk about men and women
behaving identically is HOGWASH.

Women don't want you to act the same as them!!

And they don't want to have to TEACH a man
that he needs to be more masculine.

If a man doesn't understand that a woman wants
her man to be masculine, she won't TEACH the
guy; she'll just avoid him in any sexual sense.

More than ever, men and women are ALLOWED
to be with each other, however at the same time
there is LESS attraction than ever!  The same
forces that say men and women are the same
and TECHNICALLY allow men and women
to be with each other, are also the forces that
DILUTE the sexual fire of desire between men
and women.

Here are some ways that men and women are
blurring the distinctions between the genders:

Women these days are trying to be men in terms
of trying to act "like one of the boys" sexually.
Most men tend to encourage this, thinking this is
fun or cool, not realizing this is destructive.

Many men are also trying to act like women,
thinking that this shows "sensitivity and niceness".

And many men are trying to attract women by
being "politically correct" and non-sexual.

The distinctions between men and women's
roles has become blurred, and it's not helping
men or women at all.

It's the CONTRAST between male and female
that creates the SEXUAL FIRE OF DESIRE
between men and women.

If men and women were TOO SIMILAR,
there would be NO EROTIC FIRE.

This is ALSO what I mean about being
"THE MAN".

The more YOU are THE MAN, the more
a woman feels like she is A WOMAN.

And trust me, one of the finest sexual compliments
you can ever get from a woman is “you made me
feel like a woman” or “you brought out the woman
in me”.

When a woman IS feeling ATTRACTED
to a man, she becomes like a little girl around
that guy, until she gets in bed, of course, and
then she becomes a WOMAN.

And there is no way in HELL that any
woman is going to feel THAT when a
guy acts like he is exactly like her,
as if he is another woman, just happening
to have a male organ on him.

In fact, that’s the whole IDEA of "Clark
Kent", is that his BEHAVIOR is so
NOT "THE MAN" in the movies, that
in real life this kind of NON-MASCULINE
behavior makes the part of a woman’s
brain that is responsible for PRIMAL
URGES, to “FORGET” that he is a man.

So she feels nothing sexual for "Clark Kent".

There is an INSTINCTIVE PRIMAL PLEASURE
in being a MAN around a woman who is FEMININE,
and there is an instinctive primal pleasure for a woman
to be around a man who is MASCULINE.

All else is hogwash!

So when I say BE THE MAN, I mean
be MASCULINE in every way.

It should show in your authority and tonality
when you open up the conversation with her.

It should show in your decisiveness,
in your leading the interaction, and
it should even show in your sense
of humor.

It should even show in your style of
clothing and accessories.

And it should show in the way you get
"physically intimate" with her. This doesn't
mean that you have to be an "animal" all the
time, and there is a time for being tender
with her in bed, but DEFINITELY you want
to be outgoing and primal in bed with her
as well.

To get the FULL PICTURE on the most EFFECTIVE 
way to approach, attract, and KEEP a fantastic
woman who is "the total package", I suggest you
sign up for my LIVE ATTRACTION BOOTCAMP
AND download my digital attraction programs
IMMEDIATELY.

I take what I do VERY seriously. It's why my work
has been ahead of the industry for over a DECADE
now. Rather than focus on marketing gimmicks like
pick-up lines, negs, deceptive "live footage", and
make-outs with drunk, promiscuous women, I
have focused on getting men amazing women
who are the "total package".

By the way, there are just a few slots left for my
summer BOOTCAMPS, where I train you LIVE,
so if you want to get this part of your life handled
this summer, sign up immediately.

To learn about ALL my programs that will ensure
YOUR success with women, go here NOW:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/catalog.html

Till next time,

Michael Marks 

Friday, July 14, 2017

Persistence vs. Neediness In Attracting Women

There's a lot of misunderstanding about
the role of PERSISTENCE when it comes
to attracting a woman.

We have all heard about how persistence
is such an important thing in life for
success, and this is true, but when it
comes to attracting a woman, most guys
get this all wrong.

***WHAT EFFECTIVE PERSISTENCE IS NOT***

Persistence does NOT mean to keep on
chasing some woman who shows no signs
of interest.

In fact, so often, when guys get caught up on
ONE woman, this is very often the OPPOSITE
of persistence, because they completely avoid
ALL OTHER WOMEN ON THE PLANET!

They just pour all their energy into this ONE 
woman who often is simply a woman that they
met through some convenient situation, like
somebody at work, or some woman who is 
a clerk or waitress at their local store or 
restaurant, etc.

Not only is this not the right kind of
persistence, but it actually ends up
making a guy think that this one woman
is much more valuable and much more
of a necessity for his life than he thinks,
because the mind plays tricks on us like this.

Part of it is the reverse rationalization,
that says, "Well, if I put so much energy
into this one woman, it must be a sign
that she is "the one"" etc, etc.

Plus, the other "Jedi mind-trick" going on
is that anything we do a lot of, we tend
to think is the right thing, and we even
go so far as to COMPLETELY warp all
evidence to the contrary as somehow
still being evidence that, 'YES SHE IS
THE SPECIAL ONE!'

Part of it is also the 'EASY' element,
because it's easier to just NOT go out
and approach other women, and instead
just fantasize about how cool it would
be to get this woman that works at the
local store/restaurant/school etc, etc,
etc.

The irony about all this, is that when
a guy DOES persist in the RIGHT way,
with other women, he often suddenly
hears from the "special" one, and
of course at that point he now
realizes he actually has no idea
if she's 'special' or not because
it was all his own neediness that
was distorting her into something
that doesn't even exist.

And, since he now has far more self-esteem,
he isn't particularly attracted to a woman
that didn't appreciate him then.

So, NOW, at that point, he is ready to truly
appreciate what a REAL 'great girl' is.

So let's get to it- what effective persistence really is.

***WHAT EFFECTIVE PERSISTENCE IS, PART ONE***

So let me get to what is the GOOD kind of persistence:

This is when you approach a woman, and she
is NOT suddenly showing you smiles and she
is not seeming so warm to you.

I'm not talking about her being RUDE.
There's no excuse for being NASTY.

I'm just saying if she is not really "into" your
approach in the first few moments.

THIS is where you must be PERSISTENT.

I have seen MANY of these kinds of situations
turn into wonderful relationships in real life, not
just in bootcamps, but also in my actual experiences
dating and approaching women.

A woman is not always going to JUMP UP
IN HAPPINESS at the first moment of your
approach, especially if this is not in a club
or some other party atmosphere.

So what will happen is a guy will say something
to her, she will say something back, but not much,
and the guy will instinctively have this, "GET OUT
WHILE YOU STILL CAN BEFORE SHE GETS
PISSED OFF!" feeling internally.

Or, a guy might feel that awkward feeling of:

"THIS ISN'T NORMAL, GUYS DON'T APPROACH
TOTAL STRANGERS, ONLY WEIRDOS DO THIS,
SHE MUST THINK I AM A WEIRDO!"

Well, HERE is where I say, "PERSIST!"

DO NOT EJECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are so many, many reasons why a woman
might not be showing unbridled enthusiasm.

She might simply be showing caution, she
has no clue who you are yet. So she needs
more time to "feel you out" and see what
kind of vibes you are giving off.

She might simply be feeling a need to
show she is not easy, because after all,
would YOU want a woman who IS easy?

Would YOU want a woman who gives her number
out to EVERY guy that approaches her?

Plus, it's also possible that your conversation
opener wasn't so great, and didn't get her
particularly intrigued or laughing or relaxed
in some other way, but that does NOT mean
this interaction is OVER, it does NOT MEAN
that you can't turn this into something
GREAT still.

ALSO, I want to point out here a reminder that
persistence ALSO includes BEYOND the initial
first approach, which is something I teach the
"how to" of in detail in my programs and even
included a YouTube video on:



***WHAT EFFECTIVE PERSISTENCE IS, PART TWO***

Now, here's the next part about the KIND
of persistence you need in these situations.

You need to persist being in the right state
of MIND.

And I don't mean some kind of BATTLE state
of mind, where you are saying to yourself,
"I WILL PERSIST IN THIS FIGHT AND WIN!".

You want to persist in having that combo
of states of being upbeat, dominant, and
still chilled out, EVEN IF SHE IS NOT
DOING "happy cartwheels" in response
to your initial approach.

If you start to give up your good state,
if you start to allow yourself to fall
into a freaked out state, or an angry
state, or a lethargic state, guess what?

STATES OF MIND ARE CATCHY.

So she will ALSO start to become nervous
if you are nervous. If you seem pissed
off, she may become pissed off.

And the clincher to all this, is that
most guys typically go into the WORST
states of mind when they go to approach
a woman, AND the fact that the woman
is not giving them the full approval
right away is only feeding MORE
fuel for the guy's negative emotions,
and causes him to GIVE UP and give
IN to those negative emotions, which
just fuels HER negative emotions!

This is why you must really have a 
HUGE RESERVE OF 'AWESOMENESS'
in your EMOTIONAL FUEL TANK when 
you go UP to a woman to approach her.

That TANK has to last LONG ENOUGH to
WEATHER THE STORM until she MELTS!

And YES, so often, if you just PERSIST
for those few MINUTES, she will indeed
MELT and fall for you.

So THAT'S a great way to persist, because
those FIVE MINUTES of persistence can lead
to weeks, months, and YEARS of great times
as she becomes your girlfriend.

Compare the power of THAT persistence
to the ridiculous WEEKS, MONTHS, AND
SOMETIMES YEARS that a guy spends
"persisting" for ONE woman.

A woman does NOT think you are desperate
for persisting in that INITIAL approach,
if you do it RIGHT.

But a woman DOES think a guy is desperate
if he keeps on PERSISTING for the same
woman for years. And of course usually
when a guy is doing this "years of
persistence" strategy, he is also doing
all the WRONG things as well, like trying
to show her what a great guy he is by
doing favors for her, etc, etc.

***WHAT EFFECTIVE PERSISTENCE IS, PART THREE***

Here's ANOTHER point about persistence
in that initial interaction:

A woman often gets more turned ON when
she is hard to get, and the guy KNOWS how
to get around her hard to get tactics.

It’s like the mating dance has begun, and
she requires a certain sequence of events
to happen.

Which is not to say that you are supposed
to be all predictable in everything you do,
but there is a DEFINITE pattern to the
mating ritual, for sure.

And for related reasons, it’s important that
YOU make the pattern happen, because
if SHE feels that SHE has to make it happen, 
then you are ALREADY OUT OF THE
RUNNING BY DEFAULT, because YOU 
KNOWING HOW TO MAKE IT HAPPEN 
is part of what she has been conditioned to 
believe is YOUR sexual role.

So although women very often ARE receptive
at the first moment of the approach, even
if they aren’t, it’s not time to pack
your bags and go.

You have to have persistence while at the
same time not conveying the slightest ounce
of neediness or 'cluelessness'.

You have to still maintain the playful vibe, because
in fact THIS IS ALL PART OF THE “DANCE”.

***WHAT EFFECTIVE PERSISTENCE IS, PART FOUR***

The other kind of persistence that is powerful
is the persistence in LEARNING these skills.

There's absolutely no question about it, persistence 
in learning and practicing these skills WORKS.

This is one area where taking a live BOOTCAMP
with me is so powerful, because you will get
1-To-1 PERSONAL instruction in the absolute
most "hands-on" environment on real women,
again and again and again, we will persist
like MAD over the course of the bootcamp
until you GET these skills INGRAINED.

You're getting this instruction directly
from me, so you get the benefit of all
those years of experience which will
save YOU precious TIME.

And your 'persistence' will be used in
the most EFFICIENT manner, so that you
are not just spinning your wheels, but
actually IMPROVING all the time and
actually GETTING the women attracted.

Live training allows me to speed UP
your results, because I am right there
at all times making sure you to KEEP
you on track, and every time you start
to veer off course, I will make sure
you STOP doing that, until you develop
the INSTINCTS to do it RIGHT without
even THINKING about it.

Your "instincts" for approaching women
will be honed to excellence so that
you are READY, a trained "Jedi" for
all future situations where you see
women you'd like to meet.

To learn more about bootcamp, go here:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/bootcamp.html

A lot of guys want to know if they need to study
my other programs before taking bootcamp.

The answer is that it's not REQUIRED.
I WILL teach you all you need to know to
get these skills under your belt. However,
the more you know coming into bootcamp,
the FARTHER I can take you, since you are
not coming in as a beginner.

To learn as much as you can before bootcamp,
go HERE:

https://www.thedatingwizardreturns.com/catalog.html

Till next time,

Michael Marks

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